359

So there are 359 days left of 2012 (since it’s a leap year)… 359 possibilities, right?  359 days of choosing to focus on the positive and leaving the negative where it belongs.  Many people write books and blogs and magazine articles about how to be happy – but does anyone truly know how to do that?  I don’t know for sure, but I think I do.  It just takes a few ingredients and you either have angel food or pound cake.  It’s our own choice whether we’ll have the heavenly light goodness (aka angel food) or the rich heavy thick of it (pound cake).  True pound cake is quite tasty, perhaps my metaphor is a bit off, but you get the gist.

What will you do with your remaining 359?  For me, I have a handful of hefty yet great goals that bring a smile to my face when I think about putting them in action.  My problem?  I’ve always had goals, most I’ve achieved – but they were always somebody elses goals for me.  I followed the degree path my parents suggested.  I started a family because my ex-husband thought it was a good idea.  I purchased several nice cars because society suggested a higher place on the totem pole.  I made ridiculous choices because friends told me it was the right thing to do.  I couldn’t wait for 2011 to be over.  If you asked me 6 months ago about 2011, I would have said it was confusing chaos.  If you ask me now, I would tell you the same thing, but there’s a caveat – I learned many a lesson about choices and the influence of others.  Once the dust settled and the chaos calmed, I actually figured out that I may have learned the most valuable lesson in 30 years or so…  All I can control is me.  That’s it.

I sat myself down sometime in October of last year and had a solid inner dialog.  My circle of influence isn’t necessarily that important to me.  Do I really care what Manny, Moe and Jack care about my house or my car?  Just because I’ve lived in the desert my entire life and my family is here, does that mean I need to stay just to keep them happy?  Do I really need to constantly update my status and read all about everyone elses chaos?  The answer is no.  No is a complete sentence.  Did you know that?  I didn’t until my husband told me, and he was right.

For the first time in a long time, I feel happy, safe and secure in my own skin.  So for day seven of 2012, I say no!  And not in a negative or dreary way.  Flat out no.  This is my life and only I have control over it and I am officially shutting down the ridiculous things that have influenced my choices in the past.  If this post sounds snotty or negative, then either you’ve got it all together (and I’m catching up) or maybe you should take a step back and take stock of everything that influences your life and your decisions.

I do expect this to be my heaviest post this year… I’m ready to get down and dirty and tackle what I want for me!  Check back for updates, as I plan on making this an exciting year of firsts and I would love to share them and get some feed back!

Song of the day:

http://youtu.be/eBShN8qT4lk

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2 thoughts on “359

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